The Journey - 2

When I arrived,
To God I called.
He showed,
In a flash of light.
I asked him to take me,
He refused.
The reason I asked,
But He only smiled.
And then, I could see them in Him,
All the people I killed.
A crying child.
A mother embracing.
A father protecting.
A brother saving.
God finally said,
They are but I.
Saying so, left He,
Leaving me to be.

The Journey - 1

Poor and angry I was,
Nothing but a mongrel I was.
I could do nothing for my dear,
Until my guardian came near.
He showed me the way,
And I was soothed by his say.

Anything he took care of,
Faith, I was to be made of.
He taught me a lot,
Evil or Good, I never thought.
Glory would follow, he said,
And so, never low I laid.

He said I was to behold,
The way to God.
And so, I made my journey,
Assured of Heaven's key.
My ultimate weapon was anger,
And so grew my hunger.

I did as asked,
At will, I walked.
They feared the message,
It only added to the rage.
But finally I did depart,
Happy about my part.

Life as he knew it

He lived in a life for nine months,
and then moved on from the cord to the nipple.
By the nipple he fed,
oblivious to the travesties of life.
In the cradle he loved,
wanting to be loved by all that he beheld.
And he lived not by himself,
for dependent on others he was.
It was, but an infant's life.

Outrunning them all,
he fell victim to the rule of the race.
Trying to satisfy his dear ones,
he separated from all that were dear to him.
His was a life in forlorn,
friends were the exception and never the norm.
And he lived not for himself,
but for the career that was never his to be chosen.
It was, but a servile life.

Responsibilities he took on galore,
family and friends looked up to him.
He tried to please them all,
but fall he did and very hard.
The fall was in vain,
because the liabilities only grew.
And he lived in free fall,
falling into a pit and ever trying to stand up.
It was, but a life of burden.

He tried to find peace,
but piece by piece the search took of him.
Sobriety was never his trait,
for he had lent it to the world and forgotten about it.
Heart his beat for life,
a life that he never believed in.
And he tried to bring order,
only finding disorder to be better.
It was, but a loser's life.

And then, he found the solution.
A solution, that was simple enough for him to understand.
He sought trust from within himself and which he discovered easily.
It was difficult to comprehend, but believed he, it would work.
Trial was not an option, he had to plunge headlong.
But confident he was, victory would be his for the taking.
And so he bid goodbye to the world,
killing himself and his suffering.
It was, but his life at last.

who am i?

i am subtle at times,
i am brash at times.
i come invited,
i come unwanted.
i will be celebrated,
i will be grieved.
pray tell me.
who am i?

i am the atom of destruction,
i am the karma of creation.
i have nature's fury,
i have mankind's hate.
i always fight good,
i always win good.
pray tell me.
who am i?

i am a lost memory,
i am wanderer eternal.
i carry a scythe,
i carry a mace.
i find peace,
i find riot.
pray tell me.
who am i?

i am the what,
i am the why.
i am their last resort,
i am their defining sin.
i am the ultimate truth,
i am the final deceit.
pray tell me,
who am i?

i am a mother's wail,
i am a father's tear.
i am a brother's reminiscence,
i am a sister's affection.
i am a wife's futile love,
i am a child's orphanage.
pray tell me,
who am i?

i am the conqueror of all,
i am the judge of all.
i am apocalypse,
i am judgment day.
pray tell me,
who am i?

i...am who i am not,
i...am DEATH!